We've all been told that "worrying doesn't help." But we do it, anyway. We don't sleep, we either overeat or lose our appetite, or maybe we have trouble focusing on the things we should be doing. 

Here are ten steps we can take to minimize our worries and help us in times of stress:

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1. List your worries in writing. Make three lists of past," "present" and "future" worries. Include every concern that's dragging you down. Do you have nagging thoughts about a stupid comment you made to a someone at a public meeting? That's a "past" worry. Concern about needed car repairs would be a "present" worry. And wondering how you will be able to afford holiday presents this year goes on your "future" list.

After each item, record the worst-case scenario - what is the most dreaded result? And how would it affect your life?

2. Rate your worries. On a scale of 1 to 10, assign a number to each worry based on how likely the worst-case scenario will come to pass. Number 1 would be not likely, and number 10 would be a certainty. Next, using the same rating scale, rate your list according to how much control you have over each specific situation. Then, add your ratings for each worry: the likelihood rating plus the control rating equals the action quotient.

3. Next: prioritize. Review your list and rank your worries according to their action quotient. You may find those with low scores, like the comment made during the meeting, are exaggerated worries. The chances of your reputation being ruined are small, and what could you do at this point, anyway? Write an alternative scenario for these worries. The people who heard your public comment may not even remember it, or they might not even think it was significant. The next time a worry with a low action quotient surfaces, visualize an alternative scenario. Eventually, you will begin to believe it, and your worry will melt away.

4. Decide what to do. For those worries with a high action quotient, do something to change the dreaded outcome. If your wife wants you to take dance lessons, compromise with her on an activity acceptable to you both, and dismiss that worry from your list.

5. Sort out the rest of your worries. Are the mid-range worries worth it? Devise some alternative thoughts for when those worries surface, and address those, like the car repairs, that you should deal with. If your fear of the worst-case scenario is preventing you from taking action, ask a friend for help. Does he know someone who can repair your car for less money, or would someone be willing to swap services with you?

6. Try to cultivate a "this, too, shall pass" attitude. Remind yourself that worrying is hard on your heart - you will be twice as likely to die of a heart attack. Your arteries will age quicker, and your cognitive skills will be more likely to decline if you're in a constant state of "fight or flight." And then where will you be with those rising health care and insurance costs?

7. Exercise. Of course. Exercise will help to settle your mind and absorb some of your worries. Recent research tell us that you can drop your anxiety level with as little as eight weeks of yoga. Breathing deeply and consciously relaxing for a few moments several times a day will also help. Visualize your "happy place."

8. Monitor your self-talk. Don't let your mind run away with thoughts of what you should have done or what you might do in a situation that hasn't even happened yet. You are worrying about nothing, and there is nothing you can do about it. Focus on your present. Put up a bright, red mental STOP sign in your head, and try, instead, to proactively plan contingencies based upon reality.

9. Use the answer "I have nothing to say about that." That works when others with "toxic personalities" try to inflict their worries upon you - unless, of course, you're in the mood to discuss their negative issues and perhaps offer your support. Sometimes, others take it for granted that you enjoy feeling miserable like they do. They may not be looking for solutions; they may be looking to spread the angst.

10. Finally, talk rationally about your worries with your family, your friends, and someone (like your Stambaugh Ness Trusted Advisor) who might be able to provide concrete solutions - or at least start you on the right path. It's okay to verbalize your fears with those whom you trust, and it can do others good if they commiserate with you about THEIR own problems. Try not to make angry or stressful comments to others - it does no good to raise the level of negativity in those around you.

It's difficult to completely eliminate worries, especially now when our economy is so fragile and our society is undergoing to many fast changes. But there is value in celebrating the present and making the most of what we have here and now.

While a completely worry-free existence is hard to achieve in today's pressure-filled society, eliminating unnecessary worries can free you from the past and the future and allow you to enjoy and celebrate the present.

Experts note that, if you cannot control your worries and find that they are interfering with your daily life, you should consult a mental health professional. It is possible a chemical imbalance in the brain is causing an anxiety disorder. Medications are available that might help you lead a more stress-free life.
  
For further insight, you might want to visit this blog and this website.

We can't magically fix your worries, but we can listen and provide what help we can during this time of intense concern. Please call us at 717-757-6999/800-745-8233; email your personal Stambaugh Ness contact; or simply ask for our "Economic Counselor." Thank you for your business and for your trust.